Cliffs

Something weird happened to me over the weekend. On Saturday I was kind of spaced out. BF and I watched a couple movies and then instead of figuring out what else we could do, I just sat on the couch and watched him for a couple hours. I mean, I didn't just sit there completely silent and stare at him. But we didn't really do anything specific except spend time together, talk about random stuff, hang out and do nothing. He's so goofy sometimes: rolling around on the floor with the cats, trapping them under boxes, making up songs and singing them out loud, doing different voices when he says stuff. Its weird. But I like that he feels that side of him is ok to bring out around me. It makes me laugh. He's always entertaining me.

Sunday I was sort of in the same mood. Then I started crying at one point during the day and I didn't even know why. BF asked me if he'd done something and I assured him that it had nothing to do with him. I went in the living room while he took a shower and grabbed my sketch book. I immediately started to draw a picture of 2 cliffs with a gray cloudy sky and full moon behind them. The day before I'd done a pastel drawing of a sunset with a cliff in the foreground. I realized that for some reason I've had this image of cliffs stuck in my head for the last few days. What could it mean? What am I trying to say?

Although I hadn't been dreaming about them, I looked up dreams to find a meaning for this imagery and I found these definitions:

1. Cliff Dream Meaning, Psychological meaning: You may be at a critical point in your life and fear loosing control. Emotionally you may feel as if you are 'teetering on the brink' or feel that your life is like a 'cliff hanger' movie. If you dream of climbing a cliff, it may show how you are trying to overcome an obstacle. Once over this problem the way ahead is smooth and even.

2. Cliff: To dream that you are standing at the edge of a cliff, denotes that you have arrived to an increased level of understanding, new awareness, and a fresh point of view. You may have reached a critical point in your life and may fear losing control.

3. Cliff - A place that represents a threat and feeling vulnerable. Falling from: Losing control of oneself or situation.

So I'm wondering...what do I fear losing control of? What would cause me to lose control of myself?