Already picturing it! Why?

I was making mental notes this weekend of things that I thought I should discuss in my next counseling session. One of those things is my obsession with weddings. I'm trying really hard not to think about weddings anymore and to find another career interest. I even thought of collecting all my wedding magazines and stuff, taking them out to a field and burning them... like a ritual to release all my past obsessions. But I already find myself picturing my future wedding... not the one I'd been planning with my fiance, but the wedding I'll have when I really find "the one". I'm already saying things like, "when I really get married I want to run away...have a destination wedding somewhere with only a select few people present, and I'll want a mermaid shaped dress to show off my figure instead of a ballgown like I wanted before." Um...hello!! I just got out of an engagement! I know I don't want to get married anytime soon, so why can't I stop picturing these things? I'm even picturing myself marrying my best friend now! I'm thinking "since he loves nature and canoeing so much and camping is special to us...we could have a wedding like Kevin Costner and get married in Aspen or Lake Tahoe where there's mountains and lakes...it would be so perfect and beautiful." I was even trying to feel him out a little when we were watching the Oscars and listen to which dresses he thought were hot so that I would know what style of wedding dress he'd like. I've already shown him the pics of me in the wedding dress I was supposed to wear... he didn't have much reaction to it. Must not have liked the poofiness because the only dress he really liked on the Oscars was a mermaid dress that looked like it had fishscales on it...guys have the weirdest taste in clothes!

So, am I crazy? I feel like there's something wrong with me... why do I do this? What's even crazier is that we were laying on his chaise lounge with me laying back between his legs and he was rubbing my stomach... it made me picture us exactly like that only I was pregnant! So weird... why do I do that? Do all girls do that...picture their whole future with a guy when they first start dating them? I know I've done it before too with every other guy I've dated. That's probably why I end up in relationships so quickly and they turn into long term serious ones only to end up being the wrong guy. That's something I'd really like to avoid from here on out!